Hello Hello…Sorry I didn’t post yesterday, I won’t even sugarcoat it..I just really didn’t feel like it. Monday’s are hard to attempt to be funny on, so I figured lets just skip that day.
So lets pretend it’s Monday..roll up our sleeves and get dirty?
Friday night started at a wake and ended with a bar fight. Yes, a few hours separated these two incidents, but they still happened. After the wake I went over to my buddy’s apartment and a group of us drank until we were numb and decided to make way to the bars. Not gonna lie, this was possibly the longest pregame I have ever participated in. I got there at around 9:30 and we didn’t go to the bars until it was 1:30. Thankfully, the bars by us don’t close until 4am so we had some time. We started at one bar that was pretty dead, so we literally danced in a circle, pounded a few beers and moved on to the next one. The second bar we went too used to be a favorite of mine, but as of lately it started sucking. At around 3:30 a fight broke out that was one for the books. Bouncers ran over and couldn’t break it up, so the bartenders ran over to help, and finally when both failed, the cops had to run in. This isn’ t the first fight i’ve witnessed at this place.
1st Incident– Trev, Bri, Will, Justin, and myself went to this bar around Christmas time last year. We were by the bathroom and Trev bumped into this guy. (Total Accident) The guy was beyond pissed off and looked a little too much like DMX. The guy proceeded to scream in Trev’s face, and follow us around the bar. We tried talking to him to make the son of a bitch chill out and he just wouldn’t listen. It was at the point where he told us he would like to take us outside so that he can kill us. Meanwhile, keep in mind, while this insane little Pitbull of a person is telling us he wants to bash our skull in, Trev and I are looking at him like he has 8 heads and kept saying “You need to chill, he bumped into you and apologized”. Slowly, but surely this little Pitbull of a guy turned it into a race issue. Make a long story short the fight ended with him cracking a wise ass smile and putting his arm around us and telling us “You crackers fucked with the wrong n****”. Till this day, whenever I spot him out I close my eyes and envision kicking him in the face, but I just look away.
2nd Incident – We all went to the same bar over the summer. There’s like 8 bars on this strip so hate it or love it you will be going to the same bars a lot. A group of us were dancing on the dance floor but these little bitchy girls decided they wanted to talk in the middle of the dance floor. They were getting heated that my buddy kept bumping them while he was dancing. One of us made a little comment along the lines of “it’s a dance floor, have your conversation to the sides” Naturally, they took this comment the same way they would take hearing that someone killed their grandmother. They were pissed. Half of us went to another bar while the other half went home. The remaining few decided to get pizza before calling it a night. It just so happens that the girls from the bar sat at the table next to us. Comments started flying around and one of their guy friends decided to come up to me to soothe sit situation. One of our girls Cait decided to tell him “If you hang out with pieces of shit like that, get the fuck away from us.” One of the girls walked over, grabbed Cait’s hand and slapped her, which sparked Cait jumping up and unleashing on this girl. We decided to wait about 5 minutes so that we wouldn’t have to run into them as we left, but sure enough as soon as we walked out, they were waiting. The girl went to go after Cait, but being a gentleman I jumped in front. After about the 6th slap to my face this little bitch made contact with her nail to my eye. If you know this story, you know what happened after..I won’t be repeating the rest. (Don’t worry, I didn’t hit a bitch)
Saturday was the Big Bad Bull’s birthday in the city. It was a lot of fun. A lot of our friends were there, we all took a lot of shots, and I tried sneaking into the VIP area for some Mozz Sticks. Interestingly enough, the birthday girl stayed at her party for about an hour. We missed our train so we got to the bar late, and the birthday girl had her own agenda. Only one thing funny happened on Saturday. One of our more obnoxious friends decided it was okay to walk out of her apartment with hot pink lips. This was one of the funniest sights of the night. As luck would have it, I took a picture for you.
I had a blast with those bad boys.
As if i didn’t hate Sunday’s enough…
Well I woke up sunday morning from my friends place, we did a quick recap of the night, everyone was laughing having a great time. My hangover was hardly even there so I was ready to get home relax a little, shower and tailgate before the Jets game. Well if you haven’t learned from this blog yet, my life is never that easy. As I left, my car had a flat and I didn’t realize until I was in the middle of 287. Now, when you have Amanda in the car, pulling over on the side of the road is nothing out of the ordinary, but this time it wasn’t for her to puke. I’m guilty of being a little bitch and not knowing how to change a flat. I’ll put that on the bucket list. Trevor, my college roommate from Texas would have killed me. This guy can change a flat tire in give or take 4 minutes. Freshman year when he fixed my flat he informed me “That’s the problem with y’all New York bitches, Triple A, in Texas they throw us under the cars when we’re like 5.” We had to wait for the tow truck to come and fix it. Not a big deal at all, besides the fact that I looked like a fucking idiot. I had a on a yellow looney toon’s shirt that says “Da Crew”, purple and gold Lakers shorts, argyle socks and dress shoes. Let me tell you, when that tow truck driver got out of his truck to fix my flat and I looked like that…that was rock bottom. He was cool though, fixed it really fast and I accidently tipped him a 50 instead of a 20, after seeing his eyes light up I realized the mistake I made. The day got better once I got home and went to the Jets game, and then they lost.
Overall this weekend was a good one minus the little incident Sunday morning. How was your weekend & who else can’t change a tire?